I had made up my mind not to go near Raffles again, but in my heart
I already regretted my resolve. I had forfeited love, I had
sacrificed honor, and now I must deliberately alienate myself from
the one being whose society might yet be some recompense for all
that I had lost. The situation was aggravated by the state of my
exchequer. I expected an ultimatum from my banker by every post.
Yet this influence was nothing to the other. It was Raffles I loved.
It was not the dark life we led together, still less its base
rewards; it was the man himself, his gayety, his humor, his dazzling
audacity, his incomparable courage and resource. And a very horror
of turning to him again in mere need of greed set the seal on my
first angry resolution. But the anger was soon gone out of me, and
when at length Raffles bridged the gap by coming to me, I rose to
greet him almost with a shout.
He came as though nothing had happened; and, indeed, not very many
days had passed, though they might have been months to me. Yet I
fancied the gaze that watched me through our smoke a trifle less
sunny than it had been before.
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