I had profited by
the time allowed me for reflection, and I had decided upon the
course I should pursue. I am timid, but I am not weak; and I was
determined to resist M. de Chalusse's will in this matter, even if
it became necessary for me to leave his house, and renounce all
hopes of the wealth he had promised me. Still I said nothing to
Pascal of my mental struggle and final determination. I did not
wish to bind him by the advice which he would certainly have given
me. I had his troth, and that sufficed. And it was with a thrill
of joy that I said to myself: 'What does it matter if M. de
Chalusse should be so angered by my refusal to obey him as to
drive me from his house? It will rather be so much the better;
Pascal will protect me.'
"But resistance is only possible when you are attacked; and M. de
Chalusse did not even allude to the subject--perhaps because
affairs had not yet been satisfactorily arranged between the
marquis and himself--possibly because he wished to deprive me of
the power to oppose him by taking me unawares. It would have been
great imprudence on my part to broach the subject myself, and so I
waited calmly and resignedly, storing up all my energy for the
decisive hour. I willingly confess that I am not a heroine of
romance--I do not look upon money with the contempt it deserves.
I was resolved to wed solely in accordance with the dictates of my
heart; but I wished, and HOPED, that M.
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