Th' chances ar-re th' prisidint won't know they're there, an'
no wan'll speak to thim but a cab dhriver, an' he'll say: 'Th' fare fr'm
th' Changs All Easy to th' Roo de Roo is eighteen thousan' francs, but
I'll take ye there f'r what ye have in ye-er pockets.'"
"The millyonaire that goes over there to see th' piled up riches iv th'
wurruld in sausage-makin' 'll take a look ar-round him an' he'll say to
th' first polisman he meets: 'Gossoon, this is a fine show an' I know
yon palace is full to th' seams with chiny-ware an' washtubs, but wud ye
be so kind, mong brav', as to p'int out with ye-er club th' partic'lar
house where th' houris fr'm th' sultan's harem dances so well without
the aid iv th' human feet?' I know how it was whin we had th' fair here.
I had th' best intintions in th' wurruld to find out what I ought to
have larned fr'm me frind Armour, how with th' aid iv Gawdgiven
machinery ye can make a bedstead, a pianola, a dozen whisk-brooms, a
barrel iv sour mash whisky, a suit iv clothes, a lamp chimbly, a wig, a
can iv gunpowdher, a bah'rl iv nails, a prisidintial platform, an' a
bur-rdcage out iv what remains iv th' cow-I was detarmined to probe into
th' wondhers iv science, an' I started fair f'r th' machinery hall.
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