"
"Well, they got to take their chances," said Mr. Hennessy. "Ye can't do
annything more f'r thim than make thim free."
"Ye can't," said Mr. Dooley; "on'y whin ye tell thim they're free they
know we're on'y sthringin' thim."
_The_ AMERICAN STAGE
"I've niver been much iv a hand f'r th' theaytre," said Mr. Dooley.
"Whin I was a young man an' Crosby's Opry house was r-runnin' I used to
go down wanst in a while an' see Jawn Dillon throwin' things around f'r
th' amusemint iv th' popylace an' whin Shakespere was played I often had
a seat in th' gal'ry, not because I liked th' actin', d'ye mind, but
because I'd heerd me frind Hogan speak iv Shakespere. He was a good man,
that Shakespere, but his pieces is full iv th' ol' gags that I heerd
whin I was a boy. Th' throuble with me about goin' to plays is that no
matther where I set I cud see some hired man in his shirt sleeves
argyin' with wan iv his frinds about a dog fight while Romeo was makin'
th' kind iv love ye wuddent want ye'er daughter to hear to Juliet in th'
little bur-rd cage they calls a balcony. It must've been because I wanst
knowed a man be th' name iv Gallagher that was a scene painter that I
cud niver get mesilf to th' pint iv concedin' that th' mountains that
other people agreed was manny miles in th' distance was in no danger iv
bein' rubbed off th' map be th' coat-tails iv wan iv th' principal char-
ackters.
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