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Milne, A. A. (Alan Alexander), 1882-1956

"First Plays"

)
PHILIP (to himself). I suppose I shall have to think of another
argument. (He takes out a revolver from him pocket and fondles it
affectionately.)
JAMES (looking up suddenly as he is doing this--amazed). What on
earth are you doing?
PHILIP. Souvenir from France. Do you know, Uncle. James, that this
revolver has killed about twenty Germans?
JAMES (shortly). Oh! Well, don't go playing about with it here, or
you'll be killing Englishmen before you know where you are.
PHILIP. Well, you never know. (He raises it leisurely and points it
at his uncle.) It's a nice little weapon.
JAMES (angrily). Put it down, sir. You ought to have grown out of
monkey tricks like that in the Army. You ought to know better than
to point an unloaded revolver at anybody. That's the way accidents
always happen.
PHILIP. Not when you've been on a revolver course and know all
about it. Besides, it _is_ loaded.
JAMES (very angry because he is frightened suddenly). Put it down
at once, sir. (PHILIP turns it away from him and examines it
carelessly.) What's the matter with you? Have you gone mad
suddenly?
PHILIP (mildly). I thought you'd be interested in it. It's shot
such a lot of Germans.
JAMES. Well, it won't want to shoot any more, and the sooner you
get rid of it the better.
PHILIP. I wonder.


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