My early life was passed so entirely in the immediate
service of my sovereign, and in participation of the troubles and
dangers which disastrous times and a rebellious people heaped upon
his head, that the tenor of my life has been as public as his own.
"Yet Helen, forgive me for saying that I cannot even now, in this my
day of humiliation, but glory in the happy fortune which crowned with
success my efforts in the royal cause, both in the field and in the
cabinet, and won for me at once the affection of my king, and the
approbation of my fellow-countrymen, when I remember that to these
flattering testimonies I owe not only the friendship of your father,
but the first affections of his child. How frequently have you owned
to me, in our early days of joy and love, that long before we met,
my public reputation had excited the strongest interest in your
mind--those days, those happy days, when I was rich alike in the
warmest devotion of popular favour, and the approval of--but I must
not permit myself to indulge in fond retrospections; I must steel my
heart, and calmly and coldly relate the progress of my misery and
guilt, and of its present remorse and punishment.
"You have heard that soon after the restoration of Charles Stuart to
the throne of his ancestors, I was sent on a mission of great public
moment to the Hague, where I remained for nearly two years, and
having succeeded in the object of government, I returned home
shortly after the union of the king with the princess of Portugal.
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