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Hergesheimer, Joseph, 1880-1954

"The Three Black Pennys A Novel"

She drew back, and the colour sank from her cheeks; an
increasing fear of him was visible. "In the first place," he continued,
"Essie probably wouldn't hear of it. And if I managed that it would be
only to make a private hell for us both. It would not, it couldn't, last
a month. There is nothing magical in marriage itself, there's no general
salvation in it, nothing to change a man or woman. Why, by heaven,
that's what you have taught me, that is the heart of my wanting you. You
must feel it to understand." He circled the table and laid a hand on the
back of her chair. "Susan."
Her head was bowed, and he could see only her smooth, dark bands of hair
and the whiteness of her neck. "Susan," he said again. "A second wrong
will not cure the first. If one was inexcusable the other would be
fatal. Married--to some one else, with yourself always before me--surely
you must see the impossibility of that. And am I to come to nothing,
eternally fail, because of the past? Isn't there any escape, any hope,
any possibility? You don't realize how very much will go down with me. I
am a man in the middle of life, and haven't the time, the elasticity, of
youth. A few more years to the descent. But, with you, they could be
splendidly useful, happy; happy, I think, for us both.


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