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Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville), 1881-1975

"Uneasy Money"


Which, as he's a friend of yours, is more or less of a miracle.'
She raised her eyebrows as a faint moan of protest came from
beneath the sheets.
'You surely,' she said, 'aren't going to suggest at this hour of
the day, Nutty, that your friends aren't the most horrible set of
pests outside a prison? Not that it's likely after all these
months that they are outside a prison. You know perfectly well
that while you were running round New York you collected the most
pernicious bunch of rogues that ever fastened their talons into a
silly child who ought never to have been allowed out without his
nurse.' After which complicated insult Elizabeth paused for
breath, and there was silence for a space.
'Well, as I was saying, I know nothing against this Mr Chalmers.
Probably his finger-prints are in the Rogues' Gallery, and he is
better known to the police as Jack the Blood, or something, but he
hasn't shown that side of him yet. My point is that, whoever he
is, I do not want him or anybody else coming and taking up his
abode here while I have to be cook and housemaid too. I object to
having a stranger on the premises spying out the nakedness of the
land. I am sensitive about my honest poverty. So, darling Nutty,
my precious Nutty, you poor boneheaded muddler, will you kindly
think up at your earliest convenience some plan for politely
ejecting this Mr Chalmers of yours from our humble home?--because
if you don't, I'm going to have a nervous breakdown.


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