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Lewis, Alfred Henry, 1857-1914

"Wolfville"

When he does invite us he admits frank he's
plumb locoed for a moment by the shock.
"'You bet!' says Billy, as he gets his third drink, the same bein'
took in common with the pop'lace present, 'you bet! thar ain't a
gent in camp I'd insult by no neglect; but when Willyum makes them
charges an' does it publicly, it onhinges my reason, an' them two
times I don't invite you-alls, I'm not responsible.'
"We-alls sees Billy's wounded, an' tharfore it's a ha'r-line deal to
say anythin'; but as well as we can we tells him that what Willyum
says, that a-way, bein' less'n two year old, is the mere prattle of
a child, an' he's not to be depressed by it.
"'Sech breaks,' says Dan Boggs, 'is took jocose back in the States.'
"'Shore!' says Texas Thompson, backin' Boggs's play; 'them little
bluffs of infancy, gettin' tangled that a-way about their
progenitors, is regarded joyous in Laredo. Which thar's not the
slightest need of Billy bein' cast down tharat.'
"'I ain't sayin' a word, gents,' remarks Billy, an' his tones is
sad. You-alls means proper an friendly. But I warns the world at
this time that I now embarks on the spree of my life. I'm goin to
get drunk an' never hedge a bet; an my last requests, the same bein'
addressed to the barkeep, personal, is to set every bottle of bug-
juice in the shebang on the bar, thar to repose within the reach of
all ontil further orders.


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